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Post by Crazy Horse on Dec 24, 2013 2:55:03 GMT 1
Good to see you're still alive, CH. I thought perhaps you'd fallen victim to a funnel web spider, a blue ring octopus, a box jellyfish, some vile snake, croc or platypus. That continent teems with malicious wildlife, and I don't just mean Dillzio and his fellow Aussies! I will never understand why any sane person visits down under. Except your new personal secretary, of course . . .  Ah, Renard, how good to hear your words of wisdom again. The reason I have transported Lady CH and the servants down under is to personally enquire as to the well-being of Dillzio. I too have pondered upon his absence and felt it my duty to confirm that all is well with him. However, my investigations have proved fruitless and I have been led to believe from various sources (which will remain nameless, to protect the innocent) that he has gone "walkabout" and may not emerge the same person that he once was. As a precaution before visiting this wonderful place, which is full of wonderful people, our butler telephoned all the appropriate authorities and had the entire area cleared of all offensive and potentially deadly wildlife. I am wondering if they have taken the instructions a little too far and included Dillzio in their remit? Apparently, some people here are celebrating some kind of cricket victory? A foolish game in our opinion, even more boring than golf. If the game doesn't involve tackling and depositing someone on the field of play in a rather haphazard and muddied heap then it isn't worth playing, i.e. rugby, football, even Australian rugby might be included. American football is most definitely not included as you might appreciate. I have the feeling that this post could possibly attract a few comments from our "cousins across the pond" and look forward to them. |
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Post by Knackered Sailor on Dec 25, 2013 23:03:08 GMT 1
Be careful of fakes down there, I've heard there is a dastardly plot going on passing off some awful stuff called Vegemite as the genuine article of Marmite. This stuff is, I've been told, worse than the bite of the Funnel Web spider.
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Post by Crazy Horse on Dec 26, 2013 21:28:36 GMT 1
Be careful of fakes down there, I've heard there is a dastardly plot going on passing off some awful stuff called Vegemite as the genuine article of Marmite. This stuff is, I've been told, worse than the bite of the Funnel Web spider. Ah, knackered sailor, You have entered the MARMITE debate, splendid! Of course, these Aussies have absolutely no appreciation of the finer things in life such as MARMITE on hot buttered toast. Even the other imposter labelled Marmite and made under licence is not the real thing. The real item as you will be fully aware, being such a discerning gentleman, may only be obtained from England, lovingly produced by highly skilled personnel entrusted with guarding the secret recipe that is real MARMITE, the penalty for revealing the recipe to an unauthorised person is termination of life force for both and quite rightly so. Vegemite does have its uses though. It is an efficient deterrent to any deadly creature. Just spread a line around the perimeter of your humble abode (the servants should carry out this task and it may take a large number of jars if you include the outbuildings on your estate)and this will deter any such creature from approaching the area, let alone take the terrible risk of touching the Vegemite and suffering the dire consequences of an agonising and slow death. MARMITE, often copied, never equalled. I wish you calm winds, except when you are sailing of course. Happy New Year my fellow MARMITE lover! |
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Post by toff on Dec 27, 2013 0:14:03 GMT 1
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Post by Knackered Sailor on Dec 27, 2013 13:50:32 GMT 1
MARMITE is without doubt what made England great and as long as it continues in production will ensure the safety of these sceptred isles in perpetuity, or at least so says the legend. The main ingredient of this exalted delicacy being yeast obtained from the waste following the production of Real Ales and so assists in maintaining it's very reasonable price without which it would undoubtedly be ranked along with Caviar and champagne.
I have now retired from sailing but thank you Crazy Horse for your good wishes. It came down to a choice between affording to sail or buying MARMITE so really it was no choice at all.
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Post by hghost on Dec 28, 2013 6:07:49 GMT 1
No brown sludge for this Fella....Thanks anyway....
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Post by Crazy Horse on Dec 28, 2013 8:32:29 GMT 1
No brown sludge for this Fella....Thanks anyway.... Ah, hghost, You loathe Vegemite as well then!  Splendid fellow, you are now an honorary member of the MARMITE appreciation society.  |
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Post by hghost on Jan 11, 2014 22:39:08 GMT 1
CH Hope your still having Fun ....
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Post by spindeepster on Jan 16, 2014 2:45:34 GMT 1
...................................... Have I inadvertently upset you Spindeepster? If so, there was no intent. Oh no, not at all. I realized my response was somewhat off-topic, and I just deleted it...no worries my friend! Type less....fly more. |
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